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I Hate to Break It to You: Quarantine Edition

By Terance Gerard Joseph on December 2, 2020 in OUR WORLD, Relationship

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If you apply pressure to a shaky foundation, everything will collapse. Conversely, if you add pressure on to a solid foundation it will hold. You will be steady, safe and secure.

You’ve heard that adage, pressure bust pipes. This is true. There’s also a saying that pressure makes diamonds.

Everything in life is a double-edged sword. Pressure is no exception and this 2020 quarantine has been a perfect example of that.

This past year I have seen so many: relationships fall apart, countries at war with themselves, systems collapse, businesses closed, educational institutions be exposed, parents cry for help, economies hemorrhage, and human beings question their own sanity. All with good reason. The novel coronavirus and the subsequent quarantine put pressure (there’s that word again), one way or the other, on everyone and everything in its wake.

Let me take this moment to say I AM NOT TRIVIALIZING THE DEATHS OF THOSE THIS VIRUS TOOK FROM US. I’m offering perspective. Mines. What I saw. Okay? Cool.

As stated in the first paragraph (see the first paragraph…it’s really good 👀) things with shakey foundations folded.

    • You thought that girl was magical until you had to quarantine with her and see who she really was.
    • You thought your finances were SOLID solid until you lost your job.
    • You thought your marriage could endure anything until you realized it couldn’t.
    • You thought you had exercised your childhood trauma until you had to spend hours with yourself and fewer ways to continually distract yourself.
    • You thought you were a pretty solid parent until you had to spend EVERY waking moment with your kid(s).
    • You thought you could count on your government to take care of you in a crisis until they showed you that you’re really on your own.
    • You thought your business plan was sound until it wasn’t able to change fast enough.
    • You thought your faith was enough until you realized you needed more.
    • You thought Kobe would be here forever. 😪

Okay, that last one was a bit personal but you get the point.

Many of us went through some of these. Some of us went through many. Experiencing these types of ‘losses’ (for lack of a better word) isn’t necessarily saying what we had wasn’t good. It just wasn’t good ENOUGH…….yet! Stay encouraged, Child of God

Now, as stated in the second paragraph (the whole top part of this article is REALLY good…I’m not just saying that! 👀), pressure makes diamonds.

I watched countries respond by having all of there citizens stay home except essential workers and continue to pay them a livable stipend. I watched parents adapt and lean into loving and learning more about their children (because it was that or go crazy). I watched the school my children attend adapt beautifully, almost effortlessly, to remote learning by having an “emergency fund” to hire more Computer Techs at the beginning of the school year…as I watched a charter system I used to work with flounder and staff and students suffered.

I watched romantic relationship recognize the pressure (that mf word!), communicate what it was doing to each of them and what each felt they needed. I then watched that couple grow closer and change parts of their dynamic to establish an even STRONGER ‘foundation.’

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not praising the bad things that have come from this quarantine like: a spike in domestic violence, the suicides caused by depression, the division amongst communities, etc…

I’m simply pointing to the fact that the pressure caused by this quarantine has broken things that needed fixing, to put it in simple terms.

It’s been heavy. It’s been difficult. It’s been exhausting at times. What I see, if you and I are still standing at this moment, end of year 2020, then:

We are stronger and tougher than we probably give ourselves credit for.

And…

We have an opportunity to build back the things we watched collapse. This time with an even better foundation.

 

(Author photo by Tiffany Hobbs)

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TagsBIPOC voicesBuggsy Capricovidquarantinerelationship goals

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About the author

Terance Gerard Joseph

Terance Gerard Joseph AKA Buggsy Capri is a Los Angeles music producer, writer, father and activist. Contributing to numerous sites and blogs, Joseph's (the Chief Editor of DADDY'S ISSUES, a blog focused on the ups and downs of fatherhood) writing usually focuses on community building and self-reflection. With degrees in both ethnic studies and business he spends his life serving his community in the fields of Art, education and philanthropy.

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